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20

20-BI-TEEN

New Job!

2/3/2019

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Hey Nerds,

Just a small post to let you know that I got a new job!!!!

I still work at the same store, just at a new location but with better hours and a lot things to do. I have been exhausted for the past few days because of this and, well, it's meant that all I do is work, eat and sleep, which is not giving me much time to dedicate to the blog. But it's a great new challenge that I'm really enjoying I just need a little time to adjust. So, I am taking a small break until after my birthday (February 20th).

Sorry for this little hiatus, but I need some time to get used to this new job. I hope you can all understand.

Love,

Bi Nerd

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My 50's Obsession

1/17/2019

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Hey Nerds,

I wanted to make a post that would let you all get to know me and some of my obsessions a little bit more. Well, specifically one obsession: the 50’s. It’s one of my favourite time periods. They had great art, music, clothing, interior and graphic design, cars and so much more. Yes, they were problematic years, but they are 100% my aesthetic!

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The Cars
The elongated body, the futuristic wings, the gorgeous colours, the great leather insides, and even the Dagmar lights. What is there not to like about a car from the 50’s!? Other than the fact that I already have a hard time with the length of my Toyota Corolla, so imagine me in a very long 1957 Chevrolet Bel Air. It would have so many bumps and scratches… So maybe I should get the toy model version instead of the real thing. But I do love the 50’s “futuristic” cars. If only I could get my hands on a light blue 1957 Volkswagen Beetle! My heart would skip a beat. That car is my true love. What I wouldn’t give for one! ?
The Kitchens
The 1950’s kitchens - they are also a dream! Or at least the ones in the movies are because, my grandmother’s kitchen? Not so much. But those turquoise appliances! They live in my dream kitchen. Just ask every Sims family I have created.Picture it: the black and white floors, the turquoise appliances and accessories, a cake in the oven, a supper on the stove. And a wife in my arms as she comes back from her long day at work. My perfect gay life!
The Art and Design
I love the art style and graphic design in the 50’s. The colours and shapes are great! I even use them in my designs from time to time. The styles were very space themed. They used shapes they thought were be spacecraft related, as well as a lot of stars. It makes for an interesting style.

Clothes
I love women’s clothing in the 50’s - more specifically the dresses. If the style was less expensive in plus sizes, I would wear them daily. I adore their shape, colours and poofiness. My best friend told me about @Jessicaoutofthecloset on Instagram andYoutube. She is just gorgeous, and always dressed in the 50’s fashion! She has my dream closet. I recommend you go check her out as her and her wife are adorable!
So, yes, I am mildly obsessed with the 50’s and, well, I guess it’s just part of my quirks!

Love,
Bi Nerd

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P.S. Here is one of @Jessicaoutofthecloset's videos. I picked this one because I love Her and Her wife very much. I hope you all enjoy it as much as me.
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20-bi-teen Hopes

1/1/2019

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Hey Nerds,

I hope you have been doing well. Life has been good to me lately.

I was reading my first post of the year and I realized that I have made a lot of promises that I didn’t fully keep. I made some merchandise, but not very much. I made pages on different social media platforms, but didn’t really use them. I said I would post every Wednesday, and I haven’t posted in a month or so. The list could go on... I have to admit that blogging is a lot harder than I had previously thought. Therefore, I have come up with a list of things I want to work on in 20-bi-teen(no promises, though):

  1. Freshen up the look of the blog;
  2. Post twice a month;
  3. Make my first YouTube video;
  4. Be more active on at least one social media platform;
  5. Make new merchandise;
  6. Update the Gay Playlist on Spotify or make a 2019 one;
  7. Go out and hand out some business cards to try and get more people to read the blog, and hopefully get more people to comment and ask questions to help me keep this page up and running.

Now these are great but, of course, they’re what I wish for, not necessarily what will happen. Sometimes, life gets in the way. I will try to make these changes but, as I said earlier, I make no promises. However, to let you know that I'm taking this seriously, I wanted to let you in on what I have already started working on:

  1. To freshen up the look of this blog, I have sketched some ideas of how I would like it to look. I don’t want to change it too much, as I still want it to be recognizable. Just a few changes here and there.
  2. I will make a blog notebook with a list of themes that I can use when I’m uninspired to write posts, and I started writing deadlines on my calendar for when I need to give my editor these posts, so that I can give her a healthy amount of time to edit these.
  3. I really tried to start my YouTube channel this year: I met with an artist, we had a plan, but life got in her way. Therefore, I started to draw the character myself. I also bought a good microphone, a pop filter and an editing software. Hopefully it works out soon. However, expect fewer videos than posts as they take days to make. Furthermore, don’t expect amazing drawings. I made them simple so that animating them would be easier.
  4. Being active on social media is hard. I don’t even do it for my personal accounts. Therefore, this one will depend: if I start doing YouTube videos don’t expect me to be very active online, and if I don’t do YouTube this year, then I will try to get one of my pages to be more active.
  5. New merchandise is also difficult. I have currently run out of ideas. If any of you have suggestions, please let me know, and if I start my YouTube channel and you like the character, maybe I will make merchandise with her. We’ll have to wait and see.
  6. Recently I haven’t been taking care of the Gay Playlist. I need to sit down and either make a new one or just add to this one. This is not the easiest task as, lately, I haven’t been paying much attention to songs to see if they’re queer. Feel free to leave a comment or message me if you have songs you would like to see in the playlist!
  7. Finally, I already have business cards, so that is a start. Now I just need to go and hand them out. I’m also working on a bit of a treat this year, at least in the Montreal area, which might help the comment section of this page be more active.

In conclusion, I don’t know what life will bring this year, but hopefully it’s as great and productive as I’m hoping it will be. :)

Love,

Bi Nerd

P.S. this was meant for 2018 sorry. Happy New Year!!!!!

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Lemons and Lemonade

11/7/2018

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Hey Nerds,

Sorry I haven't posted in a while. Here is what I have been up to recently.


To Move or Not To Move
My last post was in September and, just a little bit after that, my friend and I decided that we were going to move out together. It was very exciting! We looked at apartments online, and I even visited a few. As we were about to decide on one, my car broke down. The repairs were expensive, which hurt my budget. Therefore, I sadly had to cancel our plans to move out as it would have been dumb of me to move at that point. I’m very disappointed, but hopefully I can start looking again within the next year.

Health Walks
I stopped my daily walks… Short lived, I know. I woke up one morning and was so tired that I just couldn't get myself to get up to walk. And, well, from that day on I stopped. I’m frustrated at myself for stopping, but it's apparently not enough for me to start again.

Office Party’s After Party
My coworkers and I decided to go to the bar after our office party. We drank and played billiards. Some of us had a lot to drink, me included. At some point, I went to the washroom to freshen up and a girl walked in. Oh man! Was she ever my type! Long curly blond hair, beautiful brown eyes, a bit shorter than me... She went into a stall and I left without a word. I got to the table and told my coworkers about her. We continued drinking and, as I decided I wanted one last drink, I went to the bar. There she was. I decided to tell her that she was gorgeous. While I was ordering my drink after, she poked me on the shoulder to ask me my name. I told her and gave her my number. We texted quite a bit that night, but sadly my coworkers ended the night early and brought me home saying I was too drunk. The next day, the girl in question texts me that I could just delete her number as all she had wanted was a threesome with me and her boyfriend the night before. Being rejected in such a way and being told that was the only interest someone had in you hurts.

After Party Aftermath
After rejecting me, the girl from the bar decided it would be funny to hand out my number. For about two weeks, I was getting texts from random guys saying stuff like: “Hey! You seem easy. Down to fuck?” or “You’re bi? My girlfriend and I are looking for a third.” Finally there was one who actually seemed nice, but when I decided to stop talking for the night he started calling me slut, skank and other such names. I reported them and have been left alone since, but if this starts up again I might have to change my number.

SALEM!!!
On a happier note, my best friend and I decided to go on a guided tour of Boston and Salem during Halloween weekend this year. It was fun, especially when we would ditch the group and do our own thing. We took tons of pictures in Boston and had some great food. In fact, our favourite was an Italian restaurant named Bencotto: their pumpkin ravioli with sage sauce was To Die For! Honestly, I would go back just for more of them.
Sadly, it was absolutely pouring during our day in Salem. I was afraid to take pictures due to the rain. However, this allowed us to do a lot of shopping and buy witchy things. I’ll add some pictures of our trip at the end of this post.

D&D
I have recently joined some awesome people on their Dungeons & Dragons campaign. I've only played twice so far, but I already love it. The people I’m playing with are super nice and chill. It’s definitely something that has been making me happy recently.


All in all, life has been giving me lemons lately and I’m trying really hard to make lemonade with them. I just keep forgetting to add the sugar. Maybe one day I’ll get the recipe right.

Love,

Bi Nerd

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Boston Slideshow
(1 Salem picture included)

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Health and Self-Help

9/19/2018

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I hope all of you have been doing well. In this post I want to discuss what has been on my mind lately, so don't expect anything too gay or nerdy. Recently, my thoughts have been mostly about health, fall and the little things I love.

Here we go!

Health

As some of you may already know, I am not always in the best health mentally or physically and, for me, both of these things affect each other quite a bit. I am currently the fattest and heaviest I have ever been in my life. This fact makes me unhappy at times. When I look in the mirror I sometimes think that I am not pretty and that the fat is what is keeping me single. Thinking this way makes me unhappy, and then I eat my emotions, and BAM!: the never ending circle just gets worse and worse as other things happen and add on to it, such as money and living at home...

A few weeks ago, I was talking about this vicious circle with my mother and I told her that I hated the fact that I have no motivation. I wished that I would just get up and go for a walk or do anything to help change my situation. That night, I got angry at myself and decided to stop talking about wanting to change and to actually do something about it. I set my alarm clock for 4:30 a.m. and, the next morning, I got up and walked for an hour, took my shower and went to work. I had never been so proud, awake and happy at work in my life, or anywhere for that matter. So, for the past three weeks, except on Tuesdays, I have gotten up every morning at 4:30 a.m. to go for my walks. I arbitrarily chose Tuesday to be the day where I can sleep in. Do you know what I found out? That is usually the day I am least happy, so I might skip that break and just go walk every day.

As I mentioned, it has only been three weeks and I have not changed any of my other habits. Therefore, I can't say  that I've become super healthy yet but, mental health-wise, these past weeks have been pretty good. I have had a lot more good days than bad, and I am proud of myself for having done this. So, yay me! 😊

Fall and the little things I love

I love fall.
I love the colour of the leaves.
I love taking out my jeans.
I love the smell of the air.
I love the foods that come with fall.
I love the warm blankets.
I love the warm beverages.
I love that, at the end of October, my best friend and I are going on a trip.

I love so many things that I could keep this list going forever. I absolutely adore fall and I am excited that it’s finally coming!

In this post, I mostly laid down a few of my thoughts for you all to read, and they’re mostly about the little things I’ve been doing recently to help myself get through some tough times: improving my routine and exercising, as well as making a list of things that make me happy. This one is fall themed, but I don't always thematize them. Doing these lists always makes me smile and remember that the world is a great place. You just have to stop and enjoy the small things.

I know this post is different from everything I’ve posted before, but I hope you enjoyed it.  From now on, I might make a few more post where I just lay down my thoughts. Furthermore, feel free to let me know about some of the ways that you try and help yourself when you're down, and if you would like me to make more of these.

Love,

Jess
P.-S.: You may have noticed that I have changed my signature from Bi Nerd to Jess in this post. I did this because I felt like this was a more personal post and like the change was necessary for this reason. So, from time to time, I might sign as Jess when I feel a post is more personal. 
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My Encounter with Modern Homophobia

9/5/2018

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Hey Nerds,

I would like to tell you about something I believe should not be ignored - Homophobia. Even in 2018, it is still a big problem. When I first decided I would make this blog, I wanted to write about all the good things about being gay, and how it is okay to be who we are and love who we love. I wanted to show the world that being gay is not something to be ashamed of. I still want to portray this message, but I also think it's important for people to know that there are still homophobic people out there. We still have to fight for our rights. We can't give up, because it is far from over.

Today, August 9th, 2018, I came face to face with modern homophobia in a Tim Hortons. I am fine now, but I want to share the story of the hatred I received so that you may know that these things still happen.

The day started off great. It was the first day of Montreal Pride and my boss had given me a day off for the Pride parade next weekend and for the Pride show the day before that, my coworkers and I bonded over some Todrick Hall songs, and I bought myself some nice clothes. After some shopping, I decided to go have supper and a coffee at Tim Hortons where I could sit peacefully and finish the book I was reading (Annie on my Mind for those of you who are curious).

As I was reading the last part of the book, a lady walked up to my table, cleared her throat and said, rather loud and rudely: “Could you not!?” I looked up at her, confused, and asked what I was doing that was bothering her. She then proceeded to tell me that there were children in the room and that I shouldn't be “showing off” that I'm gay, pointing at the buttons on my bag and my apparently obviously gay book. Angry, I got up and said that I wasn't doing anything wrong. I was simply sitting there enjoying my iced cappuccino and my book before she had interrupted me. Then, another lady (who was at the table next to mine) got up and handed me a scrap of paper with a number which she said could help me with my situation. I pocketed the number, thinking nothing of it at that moment. During this time, the woman who had first come up to me had picked up my book and was bringing it to the trash. I ran up to her, asking her what the hell she thought she was doing. She pulled out a bible, tried to hand it to me, and told me it was a much “healthier read”. I knocked the bible out of the way to try to grab my book, but she dropped it into the trash. (It must have been in something wet because now my book is all wrinkly and ripped.) I grabbed my book and told her she had no right to touch my stuff. She retorted that I had no right to show off my “condition".

I almost punched her right there and then, but one of the employees got in between us and told me I'd better go out and take a breather. Basically, he kicked me out. A part of me is glad he did because I might have regretted what I would have done otherwise. However, I don't understand why I was the one who had to leave when she was the one who was being rude.

I grabbed my things, went to my car, and drove to a parking lot a bit further to give myself time to calm down. I was so angry and hurt that I was in no state to drive. I then remembered the paper that the second lady had given me. When I looked the number up, I found it was for a conversion camp to “cure” gay people. I ripped the paper and threw it out. I wrote to my best friend, who answered my cry for help, and I'm quite thankful and grateful for her. Now, I'm home safe writing this post.

Don’t get me wrong, despite everything, I still had it good. Everyday, there are people who get shot for being gay and, in Chechnya, there are gay concentration camps. In 2017, the people organising these camps captured approximately 200 gay men and killed around 26. We still have a long way to go before we can say that gay people are accepted. It’s true that things are better in certain countries, but we still have so much work to do. We have it good in Canada, but even in our mostly accepting country, hate still lives.

Being gay is not something to be ashamed of. I am a proud bisexual woman, but bad things happen and there are bad people out there. So, be proud of who you are and don't let these people win. Ignore them and keep being yourself, even if it can be hard to let go of this kind of hate.

I hope that this has never and will never happen to any of you.

Love,

Bi Nerd


P.S. Sorry it took me so long to get this post up. Every time I would try to write and/or read it, I would get all worked up, and then I'd have to put it aside for a few days. So, once again, I’m sorry for the wait.


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Steven Universe

8/8/2018

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* Warning: spoilers for Steven Universe up to and including the episode Reunited (the last episode of season 5) *

Hey Nerds,

Have any of you seen the show Steven Universe? It is probably one of the gayest shows I have ever seen, if not the gayest.  It’s a great show about an alien race made out of gems and a half-gem-half-human kid named Steven Universe. The gems are only female and are created by taking over a planet and draining it of life and resources. One gem named Rose Quartz decided to form a rebellion to save the Earth from the clutches of the Diamonds, the rulers of this alien species.  Along with her followers, the Crystal Gems, she protects our planet and they decide to live here after winning the war. Rose then gives birth to Steven, dying in the process. The remaining Crystal Gems (Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl) take care of and raise Steven with some help from Greg Universe, Steven’s father.

Now that you all know the basics of the show, and hopefully you've all watched it and caught up on season 5, let me tell you about some of my favourite characters in Steven Universe.

One of the things I love about the show is something that gems can do: fusion. On Homeworld, the gems’ original planet, fusion is used between gems of the same kind as a combat tactic. Usually only the gems of the same kind - especially Rubies whose role is to fight and protect - can fuse to create a bigger and stronger version of these same gems. For example, five Rubies will fuse into one giant Ruby. However, one of the Crystal Gems is what is considered an “illegal” fusion as she is actually a Ruby and a Sapphire. Together, they become Garnet, my favourite character. Unlike normal fusions who fuse for strength, she is fused for love. They literally become one and are pretty badass. Plus, just recently, Ruby proposed to Sapphire, and they got married. So, Garnet for the win! ☺️

Another character I personally like is Rose Quartz, who is definitely at least bisexual. She clearly has some love for Pearl and was in love with Greg. Furthermore, according to Pearl, Greg wasn’t the only man Rose has loved. In fact, in a song that Pearl sings about Rose (It’s Over, Isn’t it?), she mentions:  “I was fine with the men who would come into her life now and again…” Rose may not be my favourite character in the show, but she still adds a little bit more representation for the LGBTQ+ community.

Of course, we can’t forget Lapis and Peridot aka Lapidot! They may not be an official couple, however they are so cute together.  In the episode Barn Mates, Peridot tries to befriend Lapis Lazuli but the latter is angry about Peridot keeping her as a prisoner, interrogating and using her. However, later in the episode, Lapis protects Peridot and Steven and then asks Peridot if she is alright. She answers with a huge smile, which makes Lapis blush. Then, in Gem Harvest, Lapidot are found farming vegetables together and they have a pumpkin who is alive and acts like a pet dog and they both try to teach it to talk, which shows that their relationship has gotten a lot better. Finally, in the episode Reunited, Lapis returned to Earth to be with the Crystal Gems and Peridot, which had me crying way too much. Lapis is a sad and depressed character, on top of being insecure and fearful of the Diamonds, but even on the moon, where she was hiding in case the Diamonds came to Earth for revenge, she was keeping an eye on Peridot. So, yes, to me and many other fans of the show, they are a couple. (Bite me if you disagree.)

The last character I want to mention is Pearl. She was left heartbroken by Rose and who, by being so hurt, breaks our hearts. Our very single Pearl who seems to have a lot of scraps of paper with phone numbers saying “call me” because people realise she is a catch. Now that she has a cellphone, will there be some calling these numbers? Maybe even the pink-haired girl who looks like Rose? Hopefully she finds love before I die watching her pine over a dead girl. I love Pearl and I had to put her in here because she adds to the gayness of the show without being too “in-your-face.” She is a normal character who goes on with her day to day alien lifestyle. Yes, there is the occasional mention of Rose where you can see she is clearly heartbroken and still in love with her, but it's still kind of subtle compared to other moments in this show.

Steven Universe is the most openly gay kids show I have watched up to now. Props to Rebecca Sugar for making this show so great for people of all ages. Hopefully, this show can help normalise LGBTQ+ people and content for kids, teens and adults alike, and help people understand us better as a community. Kids enjoying this show at a young age will most likely be more than okay when they hear that their friend has a crush on someone of the same sex in the future. This is one of the reasons why I adore Steven Universe.

Let me know what you guys think about the show!

Love,


Bi Nerd

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Queer Questions 2

7/25/2018

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Hey Nerds,

For those of you who have been following my blog for a while, you know what QQ (Queer Questions) is and a lot of you have told me that you loved it. And for those who are new here and have not seen QQ 1, then here is what it is all about: I have sent LGBTQ+ related questions to some of my friends and some of my friends’ friends and they have sent me back their answers. I removed their names to keep their anonymity, but their answers have remained their own. This time, I have asked four new fun and exciting people. I hope you enjoy reading their answers as much as I did!

Q1:  How old are you? (Teens, twenties, thirties, etc.)
P1:     21.

P2:     Early twenties.

P3:    70’s (barely).

P4:    I am in my twenties, 28 to be exact, and fearing the days to my next birthday ‘cause getting older isn’t            as fun as I thought it would be when I was younger haha.

Q2: What is your sexuality?

P1:     Pansexual.

P2:     Queer / bisexual.

P3:     Lesbian.

P4:    Pansexual.

Q3: What is your gender identity?    

P1:     Female.

P2:     I’m non-binary.

P3:     Female.

P4:    Female.

Q4: How and when did you figure out your sexuality and/or gender identity?

P1:    I found out when I was, like, 11 that I was attracted to girls.

P2:    Oof. I knew I wasn’t straight in high school, though I’ve only recently figured out that I was bisexual (and that bisexuality includes non-binary people). I’ve never felt like I fit into the binary genders; I have vivid memories of looking in the mirror in elementary school and thinking that something went wrong in the womb and that I wasn’t in the right body. I’ve been out as non-binary for around a month now.

P3:     I had some relationships with women when I was at university. When I was 26, I left a 4 year relationship with a man because I figured I would keep getting attracted to women, and I didn’t want to be a married lesbian! It was at the time of the women’s movement.

P4:     I found out I was bi when I was in high school, around 15 or 16 years of age. I began to watch gay porn and found myself more and more interested in it, I also struggled with the feeling of never being complete. I also saw woman as being amazing and beautiful, and felt wrong as a boy. I never loved myself and, some days, I still don’t, but I began to identify as a female about 3 or 4 years ago, right around when I also became pansexual as well.

Q5: Has it affected you in your day to day life? If so, how?

P1:    When I was working at one of my old jobs, some of the other employees didn’t like the fact that I had a girlfriend.

P2: 
   Well, I get misgendered a lot, seeing as I’m “female presenting”. It’s made my life a lot more stressful, seeing as gendered bathrooms and fitting rooms are a thing.

P3:     Yes. My father’s still not crazy about it. Work has been OK. It used to be a big deal for me to tell a new friend or coworker about my lifestyle, and some friendships didn’t survive, but lately it hasn’t been a big deal.

P4:    It has: the daily struggle to ask people to call me her and not him, the struggle to feel like I belong, let alone feel like I am girl when I am for the most part dressed down as a boy, especially at work, or also how I would feel if and when people discover I am trans. All of it makes day to day life a bit of a struggle but, like so many, I will survive.

Q6: How was your first coming out experience?

P1:    I didn't really have a coming out experience because my sister came out the year before me. Then, one day we were in a car with my mom, and my friend Wendy said “You really think your daughter is straight?” That's pretty much how it came up that I was bisexual / pansexual.

P2:    It was very low key. A girl I had a crush on had texted me, asking me if I wanted to hang out, and my mom asked me why I was all smiley, and I told her. My mom took a few seconds to process and said “Cool!”

P3:    Illuminating. I was curious about kissing a woman, and then discovered that I wanted to pursue the relationship.

P4:    Odd, not many reacted too harshly to me being bi, except for a friend who figured sitting away from me was a good idea. Coming out as trans, however, created an mix of interesting and expected reactions from anyone and everyone. Some accept it fully, others try to brush it off, and some continue to resist it and even try change my mind even as I write this.

Q7: What is the most annoying question you have been asked when coming out?

P1:    “Are you sure that you like girls or is it just a phase?”

P2:    Well, I’ve only been in serious relationships with girls up ‘til now, and I’m asked “But would you sleep with a guy?” (which I would and have), or “Ok, but can’t you just pick a gender?” (I have and its non-binary).

P3:    I suppose: “What do you do in bed?”

P4:    “Why?” No joke, the most annoying one I could ever get for either being pan or trans is “why?”. This then descends into the most annoying and botched explanations I can give as I become nervous and unprepared, which then only fuels most people's resistance or lack of understanding.

Q8: Would you say your look is stereotypical of your sexuality and/or gender identity?

P1:    I don’t know if I dress stereotypically. I just dress however I feel like that day.

P2:    That’s the thing with non-binary: there isn’t really a typical way to look, or a way to “pass” as non-binary. I suppose a stereotype is an undercut and short hair, which I have.

P3:    I don’t think so, though I am way more casual than the other women in my family.

P4:
    That depends on your opinion. I am a cute girl. I am all about my legs, ankles, and feet, all about the heels, short skirts, the light makeup, and cute plastic colored hair ties I wear around my wrists ‘cause they ended up looking cuter that way than in my hair. On the other end, I wear a cowgirl hat, jeans and work in a warehouse where I develop muscles outside of my weekly gym workout, have steel toe boots, no makeup, tied back hair with hair pins to control my curly hair, and shorts that show my legs. All of it can scream tomboy, depending on your view.

Q9: Are you a fan of everything LGBTQ+ in tv shows, movies, music, games and books?

P1:    Yes, I am a fan of LGBTQ.

P2:    Ehhhh, I don’t like it when media adds LGBTQ+ people for the sake of a plot point. While I totally get how coming out stories are important to show for closeted people, I just want characters who do their thing and happen to be LGBTQ+. Also, it would be nice if creators stopped killing lesbians.

P3:    Some stuff. I used to be way more into the music scene.

P4:    Depends on how it is portrayed. If done right, sure! I love seeing all of that, though it can create tension between people in that room. For example, a night ago in a crime show my parents were watching, a trans girl was killed. My parents aren’t 100% okay with me being trans, and to have a tv show we are watching make an episode about it, it can and does cause a quiet tension - none of us commented at all on the episode, where as we generally do.Things like that can hit home as it created a very dark feeling. On the upside, seeing gay and lesbian characters, and even trans characters, in anything is always nice, welcoming and warming, because the truth is that we are here, and we are here to stay!

Q10: What is the best/your favourite representation of queer people you have seen in a tv show or movie?

P1:    I like “I Am Jazz,” “Queer Eye,” and Ellen DeGeneres, though I could keep the list going.

P2:    Brooklyn 9-9. “BOOOOOOOONE?!?!??!?!” *

P3:    I liked Ellen when she did the comedy show.

I like the way Instinct portrays the gay couple.

I always like it when there are positive gay characters or moments on mainstream TV. I also enjoyed a bunch of films at Image&Nation, the lesbian and gay film festival, but I haven’t been as often since moving to the West Island.

P4:    The only one that comes to mind, sadly, is “The L Word” and, even then, I’ve only watched two episodes of that. I am don’t watch TV and movies as much as I once did. I am a more of a gamer and writer/reader.

Q11: What ways do you or have you used to try to find someone to date and/or hook up with? Dating apps, clubs, blind dates, etc. In your experience, have they been effective?

P1:    I never used any dating apps. I actually met my girlfriend because of school.

P2:    I’ve used Tinder with moderate success and ended up making quite a few friends on there, though no romantic relationships have come of it. Most, if not all, of the people I’ve dated I’ve met through friends.

P3:    I met some women at a hiking club, Les Amazones. And I’ve met women at dance clubs or dances. I enjoy going to Club Bolo, a gay line dancing club, though there are way more men than women. I’m not really looking at the moment.

P4:    I am too shy to do any of that, even if I really really want a buddy to share a bed with, if you know what I mean. So, to answer your question properly, the ways stated above are not at all effective for me.

Q12: Are you currently in a relationship? If yes, how did
​you meet?

​P1:    Yes, I am in a relationship with my boyfriend. I have known him since high school and he got kicked out of high school when we were in grade 9 and, after 5 years, he showed up at my door and we talked. Three weeks later, we started dating.

P2:    I am a single pringle. :)

P3:  
Nope, but I was in one a few years ago for 13 years with a woman I met at a woman’s hiking club (Les Amazones).

P4:    Yes I am, happily actually. I meet my girlfriend in a gaming group for a game we both support and play. Our love flourished slowly and, every day, we realize we are meant for each other more and more.

Bonus Question!

Q13: Do you ever impulsively buy objects just because they have rainbows on them?

P1:    Yes. Yes, I do

P2:    For a long time I did, but capitalism is evil and I’m trying to cut back on my purchases.

P3:    No, but I like rainbows! And my nephew gave me a t-shirt from Google with two androids holding hands and carrying a rainbow flag, which I get compliments on!

P4:    Kind of. I do not believe I own anything with an exact rainbow, but I do own a few things with beautiful colors on them.
Wow! Am I the only one who loved reading these, or what? I am glad I did the QQ post once more. It is always so much fun! My only problem is that I'm running out of questions to ask. If you have any questions you would like to be answered in a future QQ, or for any other kind of interview type post, please feel free to send me your suggestions! You can always contact me through my email binerd@outlook.com or by leaving a comment down below.

Love,

Bi Nerd
* Question 10, P2 reference. 
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My Favourite Gay Ships in Television Shows

7/19/2018

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*Warning: This post contains spoilers about Doctor Who and Once Upon a Time.*

Hey Nerds,

Once in a while, people will watch a tv show or movie and wish with all their might that two of their favourite characters end up dating. This is called shipping and the pair of characters is known as a ship. Someone’s absolute favourite ship is known as their OTP (One True Pairing). If the characters actually do end up together in the show or movie, the ship is then referred to as “canon.” Now that I’ve filled you in on the terminology of shipping, let me tell you about a few of my gay ships and how one of them will never come to be.

Let's begin with the Mad Archer (a.k.a. Nobin) and Tower Girl. This canon ship has to be one of the only reasons I actually finished watching Once Upon a Time. The show was starting to get a little too repetitive for my taste, but seeing an actual gay couple as part of the main story kept me interested in the show as I wanted to see them happy. There have previously been other queer representation in the show - Red and Dorothy ended up together and Mulan was gay - but, unlike the Mad Archer and Tower Girl, they never got much screen time. Furthermore, these two actually got their “happily ever after,” so I couldn’t have asked for better! 😊

My second favourite fictional couple is River Song (my “bae”)  and the female Doctor. As there have yet to be any episodes with the new Doctor, there is very little content to go with this ship, yet fans have still found a way to create some great content! There is a ton of fan art, fan fictions, and so much more already. Plus, this couple isn’t far fetched as the Doctor and River are already technically married, though this happened when he was in one of his many male regenerations. Moreover, many characters in Doctor Who aren’t straight, so why not these two? Also, there is a quote in the movie The Husbands of River Song where River says: “You know who you remind me of? My second wife.” Hence, we already know that River is okay with dating women. There’s no reason this shouldn’t happen. I can't wait to see what the writers will do!

Finally, I want to talk about my OTP, la crème de la crème, my one reason to live (Okay, I’m definitely exaggerating, but you get my point.): SwanQueen! The idea of Snow White's stepmother a.k.a. the Evil Queen a.k.a Regina (my other “bae”) dating Emma Swan, Snow White's daughter, is just the most hilarious thing in my opinion. Plus, they raise a son together. It would have been so easy for the writers to make this ship happen instead of queerbaiting* us through subtext and sexual tension. No, instead they brought in Captain Guyliner (as Regina nicknamed Captain Hook) and decided that he and Emma would get married and have a child. So, as you can guess, the show ended without SwanQueen actually becoming canon. It makes me so sad, but they will forever hold a special place in my heart, and on my Tumblr page.Thank the world for SwanQueen fans who make tons of fan art and little jokes using moments in the show. Here is one of my favorite fan made SwanQueen crack videos. It was actually the first SwanQueen thing I ever saw and is basically the reason I fell in love with the ship. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do!
What about you guys: Have any of you been queerbaited by a show before? Or do you have a ship that you really wish would come true? If so, let me know in the comments. 

Until next Wednesday!

Love,

Bi Nerd
​*Queerbaiting: When a movie or television show suggests that there may be a queer relationship between characters, often to attract LGBTQ+ viewers, but never actually follow through.
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Bisexual Representation in the Media: Rosa Diaz from Brooklyn Nine-Nine

7/11/2018

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*Warning this post will contain spoilers for the episode “Game Night” from Brooklyn Nine-Nine, season 5*

Hey Nerds,

I have recently finished watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine. My friend Gay Wolf strongly recommended it to me and told me about the bisexual and gay representation in the show. Seeing as I have been looking for this kind of representation, I gave it a shot. And am I so glad I did!

The episode “Game Night” of the show Brooklyn Nine-Nine was an intense one for the detective Rosa Diaz and, I suspect, for many of the viewers as well. Rosa came out as bisexual. I feel as if her coming out is a good step towards our representation in the media. Therefore, I think it's only fair to make a post about it. I will try to point out a couple of the things that stuck out to me, as well as why this is such an important episode.

Firstly, I wanted to point out that we were clueless about Rosa’s sexuality for more than four and a half seasons of this show. Most people probably assumed she was straight since it is still the “norm” for most people and most characters in the media. Furthermore, she was dating Adrian, a cis-man, which only reinforced this. As much as having assumed that Rosa was straight annoys me, it also makes me happy. Think about it! If everyone assumed the same thing I did, then her being bi can make people realise that bisexual people actually exist. We may not be easy to “pick out," but there are many bisexuals out there, including myself. We are normal people, just like them. It may also help them understand that being bisexual does not mean that that person is more likely to cheat on their partner. Of course, there are bisexuals who cheat, but guess what, people who identify as any other sexuality are just as likely to do so! Liking more than one gender doesn't automatically mean we will cheat on you. That's why it's great that they made Rosa bisexual! We see her date a man for a long time and she never once even thinks about cheating on him. She may not be a marching pride parade, but she is a great source of representation that most shows don't give us. Most of the time, bisexual characters are represented as cheaters in the media, playing into and reinforcing the stereotype. Just take a look at Maureen in Rent: there is an entire musical number dedicated to her cheating habits. Here is a link for those of you who don't know the song and movie, as I still strongly recommend watching it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D0QfCIQgD94

Another thing I loved from this episode is the different questions she got asked throughout. For example, her friend and fellow detective, Amy Santiago asked her “How long have you known?” I love this question. Usually people will ask “How long have you been bisexual?” as if it was something we chose to become when it has simply always been a part of us. Another question Rosa got was “What made you to decide to tell us now?” I like this one because it wasn't asked out of anger for not having been told sooner, but out of sheer curiosity. When I was asked this same question, I could feel my parents’ annoyance in not having known sooner and their fear that I had a girlfriend. Lastly was “How did your parents take it?” This can often be a difficult question to answer. In the show, after asking her this, Jake finds out that Rosa is not out to her parents yet. These three questions are asked with respect in the show, which I adore. When coming out in real life, a lot of us get asked indiscreet and disrespectful questions, or similar questions but with a tone of anger or annoyance, which can be hurtful. Rosa is lucky to have such a supportive and understanding team.

​The last thing I would like to discuss about this episode is Rosa’s parents, as they said a couple of things that made me cringe. When Rosa finally decides to come out to them, they don’t take it very well. At first, she meets them at the restaurant with Jake there for support. During this supper, they tell her that they would prefer her being someone's mistress rather than being gay. Later, her parents tell her that they are okay with her being bisexual, since she still likes men, and her father even insists that she will marry a man because “this is just a phase”. Rosa asks them to love her and accept her for who she is. By the end of the episode, her father starts to come around to the idea that she is not straight. Her mother, however, sadly still hasn’t. I understand Rosa’s pain; my parents are still wrapping their heads around the fact that I am bisexual. But, I'm still lucky: they have been very accepting in general, and they’ve been trying really hard to understand. I love them for it.  I wish Rosa the same luck as I have, in the end.

Hopefully we will get much more representation like this - true representation - in the future.

​Love,

Bi Nerd


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