Queer Online Dating

Hey Nerds,

Today I wanted to talk about a subject that I think a lot of people these days can relate to: online dating.
I’ve been on a whole lot of dating sites: Her, Tinder, Bumble, Compatible Partners, eHarmony, Ok Cupid, Match, Plenty of Fish, Meet Me, Hot or Not, Zoosk, Lesarion and sooooo many more. With all these dating apps I used to think “How the hell am I still single?”. Before you ask, I’m still single and I’m still on two of these apps. Honestly, I think a lot of these are great or could be great. I’ve talked to a lot of nice people on some of these and a lot that I wouldn’t hang out with. I know that there are people out there that you won’t click with and that is fine.

So far, my favorites have been Her and Tinder, so let me tell you a bit more about them:

Her

Her is my favorite app, format-wise. For those who don’t know Her, it’s a dating app/social media platform for female identifying and non-binary people. Much like most dating apps, you see people and you can swipe through them. Only if you swipe left it doesn’t mean you dislike, in fact you can always come back to their profile. To like a person, you click on the heart on their profile. Then, if this person has liked you as well, you can chat and get to know each other. There is also a wall where you can post a status, like on Facebook, but it’s a common wall for everyone. Plus, every day, Her posts a daily question on this wall such as “What are your Christmas traditions?” or “What is your favorite kind of sandwich?” Some people answer, and you can read what they wrote. Her also organises parties where you can meet a bunch of other people in the LGBT+ community that decided to go to the event.

Her even has soooo many gender options as well as sexuality options.
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Sexuality options: Lesbian, Queer, Gay, Bisexual, Bi-curious, Fluid, Pansexual, Flexisexual, Polysexual, Asexual, TBD, Questioning, Straight and Demisexual.

Gender options: Female, Trans Female, Non-Binary, Boi, Agender, Androgynous, Bigender, Cis Female, FTM, Gender Fluid, Genderqueer, Intersex, MTF, Other, Pangender, Trans Person, Transgender, Transsexual, Two-Spirt, Hijra, Kathoey, Mak nyah, Muxe, Waria, Mahῡ and Questioning.

All in all, Her is a great app. I just wish that there was a version of this app for all genders. Her & Him.
 
​​Tinder

Tinder is a classic. Most people have at least tried it. You swipe left if the person is not your type, swipe right to like and swipe up to Super Like (which means they’ll get a notification). The only problem with Tinder, I find, is that I haven’t had a single match talk to me for anything other than sex. Personally, that’s not what I’m looking for. I’m looking for a relationship… Oh well… I still like the idea of the app and many of my friends are now in relationships thanks to it.

All in all, the biggest problem with dating apps is that most people that you match with don’t write back. Sometimes, you will get a “Hey”, but most times you just get a big silence. I’ll write “Hey!” and, three months later, I’ll look back and notice they have seen the message and didn’t answer. So, dating apps are maybe not the answer for everyone, but it seems that, these days, humans interact less and so it may be our only real option.

Either way, I wish you all luck in your love lives and just know that I love you.
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Love,
Bi Nerd